I’m not getting on the internet all summer, so…
if you’re trying to get ahold of me, you can either e-mail or contact me on goodreads (the only “social” sites I’ll use): Howaboutno36@aol.com, Howaboutno36@yahoo.com
Throwing away my computer and phone
(by agreatplacefor)
My friend moved out this week so I get to upgrade from my box room to a big room ! :D words cannot describe how glorious it will be to have actual SPACE.
Source: agreatplacefor
I love having my brother home!
Discussions on Woolfe, Plath, Kant, Rawls, the political/international atmosphere, individual plights, Conrad, Dostoevsky (versus Tolstoy)… I think we’ve yet to agree on a topic yet, but there’s always friendly competitive banter.
The oldest-child complex still bugs me.
Cautiously, I allowed
myself to feel good
at times.
I found moments of
peace in cheap
rooms
just staring at the
knobs of some
dresser
or listening to the
rain in the
dark.
The less I needed
the better I
felt.
(via fckyeaharthistory)
Source: larmoyante
Everything is more complicated than you think. You only see a tenth of what is true. There are a million little strings attached to every choice you make; you can destroy your life every time you choose. But maybe you won’t know for twenty years. And you may never ever trace it to its source. And you only get one chance to play it out. Just try and figure out your own divorce. And they say there is no fate, but there is: it’s what you create. And even though the world goes on for eons and eons, you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second. Most of your time is spent being dead or not yet born. But while alive, you wait in vain, wasting years, for a phone call or a letter or a look from someone or something to make it all right. And it never comes or it seems to but it doesn’t really. And so you spend your time in vague regret or vaguer hope that something good will come along. Something to make you feel connected, something to make you feel whole, something to make you feel loved. And the truth is I feel so angry, and the truth is I feel so fucking sad, and the truth is I’ve felt so fucking hurt for so fucking long and for just as long I’ve been pretending I’m OK, just to get along, just for, I don’t know why, maybe because no one wants to hear about my misery, because they have their own. Well, fuck everybody. Amen.
Source: human-voices
Christianity loses its appeal when the disciples begin to speak in ambiguous terms. The hordes of pedantic Christians take their daily bread from ancient prejudice and simpleminded/uninformed misunderstandings. #homophobia #schismatic #contempt #narcissism #militance #ignorance #DisdainToProgress #TragicLackofChrist
Can you be absorbed in modern society and still truly align with Christ?—in your mediocre habits, your lukewarm sensibilities, when all your moral acts are motivated by the gentle whispers of guilt in your ear? I’m not defending extremism—as in fundamentalism, which is a disgusting distortion of doctrine—but Christ was not conservative in the sacrifices he made, as it was all in the eternal perspective.
I hate arguing with Christians when I have to feign a Christian position; defending scripture’s infallibility is much more difficult at these times.
Again, I feel the coldness of a world deserted, a sign that my faith has begun receding to distant shores of incredulity and cowardice—those that my beliefs have long inhabited. They’ve fled, leaving me alone, again. This time I’ll truly see,—is someone there?—or will I sit here shivering, weeping alone?
I imagine father proud in my darkest moments of shame and iniquity; such is my idea of utter rejuvenation. Imagine him proud, applauding my accolades and meritous success; such is my idea of infinite reward. But… he’s gone,—only his memory, a weak and fading memory, remains. (Make father proud)
Patience, temperance, honesty, understanding, empathy, kindness, and collectively: love. To live is not to love, but to love is finally to discover life. I’m ready… for what? I’m unsure, but I’m anticipating something magnificent. I struggle to remember to strive for truth restlessly, but it’s difficult without some beacon, some guide; I need counsel to light my way or a model by which I can form my own path. A heart to listen? God may be angered by the nonsense I consider before Him, but it leaks nonetheless.
I almost fell into hatred once more, but something I found within—or about myself—inspired salvation; it’s a salvation from my innards, it hasn’t been drawn. Maybe it’s temporal, but maybe this defense of love is eternal like mathematic law.
The Feel Again (Stay), Into the Ocean, Hate Me, Kettering, Tautuo, The Sun Is Often Out, Such Small Hands, None Not Even the Ocean, About Today, The Leavers Dance, Hurt, In Dreams, Sorrow
We do not go into the desert to escape people, but to learn how to find them.
To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god.
Source: proustitute
